December 2010
21 posts
4 tags
“I’ve never been a ‘my glass is half full’ kind of guy....”
3 tags
“Pride is believing you’re hard to find.
Humility is realizing that nobody...”
“Sure, I have a perfect attendance record. I never show up.”
3 tags
“New bomb leaves buildings standing but causes people to die of embarrassment....”
2 tags
“Cheeseburger salad is the comb-over of menu choices.”
3 tags
“Spirituality is a lot like masturbation. I don’t want to know how you...”
“As a child, I was forced during family visits to kiss my great grandmother, who...”
“Gay people CANNOT destroy the institution of marriage. But if that’s your...”
“Headline: “Study: Women Keep Weight Off Better than Men.”...”
“The trick to creating art is being as willing to burn it as to build it.”
“He’s makin’ a list. He’s checkin’ it twice. He’s...”
“Synonyms for “fight” make great food names: Try the Lobster...”
“The counterpart of an egg donor is a sperm donor, NOT a bacon donor.”
2 tags
“Just leave my tax cut on the dresser.”